The Son, the 6,000 Book Owner Dad and I were at the beach today. While there, a trio of girls were listening to their iPods, and one started singing Rick Springfield’s “Jessie’s Girl.” I do not think that is the worst song ever, it’s super-catchy, in fact, but I can’t fathom actually choosing to listen to it on an iPod (and then listening to Tony Orlando & Dawn’s “Knock Three Times”!)

But it led me to wonder–what is the worst song ever? For me, it would have to be Paul Anka’s “Having My Baby,” but that is because he is Canadian, Canada has a Canadian content law that says a certain percentage of songs played on the radio have to be from Canadian artists, and my family and I were traveling through Canada the summer it was out. Ergo, I heard it once every ten minutes for a month.

Of course, that is a personal moment in time colored by the agony of traveling with my family hearing a song I despised; a priori (have I mentioned I [heart] Kant?) what are the worst songs ever?

There are bands I dislike; Violent Femmes, Fine Young Cannibals, Four Seasons (Frankie Valli’s voice makes my skin crawl), Journey, Rush (like fingernails on a chalkboard), and Abba.

But I can’t think of specific songs; “You Light Up My Life,” “Feelings,” and “Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer” are all up there, but are they the worst?

What’s your nomination for the worst?

So the Seven Year-Old hasn’t watched the darn movie in years and years, but still, I’ve had The Lion King’s “Hakuna Matata” going through my head for the past week.

Maybe I should start listening to Metallica.